Don’t Let Fear Drag On

We all experience fear. We all know what it feels like to be afraid. This is a necessary human emotion. But it also holds the potential for great destruction.

From an evolution standpoint, fear makes complete sense. Those who could sense approaching danger quickly and respond immediately could fight off a predator. Or a quick sense of fear could tell us to run away. By being sensitive to fear, we could increase our chance of survival.

In The Disordered Mind – What Unusual Brains Tell us About Ourselves, author Eric R. Kandel says, “Our reaction to fear is an adaptive response, one that helps us survive. It is a program of actions sometimes referred to as the ‘fight, flight, or freeze’ response. These actions include musculoskeletal changes (the facial muscles assume a mask of fear), changes in posture (a sudden startled movement, followed by rigidity), increases in heart rate and respiration, contraction of the stomach and intestinal muscles, and secretion of stress hormones such as cortisol. All of these changes in the body take place in concert, and they send signals to the brain.”

If we dissect the various reactions our body has to fear, we can start to see the potential for destruction. Increases in heart rate and respiration are helpful to give us energy to fight or flight. But they are meant to be short-term.

Rigidity might have benefits but if we stay rigid, we will develop stiffness. If we continue to generate cortisol, we will continue to have feelings of stress. If we contract our stomach and intestinal muscles for a long period, we will generate discomfort.

This might not seem significant, but it is. Systems thinking tells us about the feedback loop. The feedback loop takes the output from a system and puts it back in as an input.

Then it gets magnified and send out of the system only to be entered back into the system. It is magnified again, and each pass becomes more and more extreme.

When I was younger, I created this feedback loop around fear. I would clench my stomach muscles all day. I would feel stressed out and rigid. I felt an uneasiness that I later learned was equivalent to long-term fear.

But over time, this loop kept growing. The effect on my body was deterioration and increasing feelings of stress.

This wasn’t due to a predator about to pounce on me. It wasn’t due to some catastrophic event. It came about from unaddressed fear and a continuation of a feedback loop.

The way I broke through this systematic problem that I created was to constantly strive to break the loop. Instead of letting it get reinforced over time, I took it upon myself to reduce it over time.

When I would feel stressed, I would find ways to reduce that stress. This often meant turning to exercise, breathing exercises, or finding ways to feel grateful. It meant that I had to be on the lookout for signs of stress.

I learned I couldn’t turn and run from stress. I had to face it head on. It often signaled that I was on the wrong path and needed to change. By taking it head on I did everything possible to keep it in check. I started to shift from constant stress to sporadic stress.

When I learned that by clenching my stomach, I promoted those feelings of tightness and anxiety, I learned to relax my stomach. I learned to exercise to work off extra energy. I would stretch to keep muscles from tightening up.

The point is that there is a way to break a feedback loop. It is often difficult at first. But over time becomes easier and easier as the fear system loses strength. The new systems gain strength from their own feedback loops creating a whole new outlook on life.

Fear is natural. But fear has the potential to be destructive. It has the power to ruin one’s life. It can grow into a devastating feedback loop. But it is also something that we have at least some control over.

If the fear lasts long after the threat vanishes, learn to address that fear directly. That lasting fear can have negative consequences if we don't gain control over it.

Focus on that small control. It can grow. But don’t let it stop you from tackling the fear feedback loop. You can prevent it from becoming a long-term fear that pulls you away from living a life of happiness.