The Journey Makes Us Feel Alive

When I was in college earning a psychology degree I studied Abraham Maslow. Maslow brought the world of psychology a great deal. His insights are still relevant today.

Maslow is most known for his hierarchy of needs. This is a pyramid structure that explains human motivation.

At the very core level, the bottom of the pyramid, are physiological needs. This means that if everything is stripped from one’s life, these will be most important.

This represents things such as the air we breathe and water to quench our thirst. It represents food to provide energy and our ability to sleep. These elements are of the utmost importance to sustaining our life.

If we are find ourselves with nothing, then these are the first things that need to be met. If you find yourself stranded in the woods, you are going to care about making sure you get water and food to stay alive. If you fall into a lake, the most immediate need is to be able to breathe.

The next level, once those needs are met, are safety needs. If you have plenty to eat and drink, next you want to make sure have a safe place to stay. Safety is important but if you are dying from lack of food, you will risk your safety to find something to eat.

The next level is Love and Belonging. This represents friendship, family, and social belonging. These are important in life, but if you are in the wilderness, food and safety will certainly be the first thing you need.

Next is Esteem and Respect. The respect of others is important but only after those lower needs are met.

Finally, the top level is Self-Actualization. This is a self-fulfillment level where you feel complete. Being self-actualized means having an inner sense of contentment.

As I sat in a lecture about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, I listened intently as the instructor talked about each level. He emphasized that nothing is guaranteed in life. He said that most people never approach the self-actualization level.

I was instantly drawn to this concept. This idea of being whole, of being content, intrigued me. As I pressed him for more he expounded on his thoughts around self-actualization.

I started to explain self-actualization as the rewards for a highly successful life. I envisioned meeting goals and then being happy and content. I assumed this was the end of a major journey.

But then he said something that caused me to rethink everything. He said that if you were to talk to someone who has achieved self-actualization, they would emphasize the journey over the destination.

Wait, huh? This can’t be right, I thought. How can they be enjoying the journey more than the destination? The destination is what we work for. That is the goal we set. That is when we “arrive”. That is when we succeed.

It has been 20 years since that lecture, but I still remember sitting in that classroom hearing those words. They have played out in mind over and over since then. “The journey is more important than the destination.”

Maslow described self-actualization as a desire to become what we are capable of. The fact that it is a “desire to become”, is important. It is a striving. It is a feeling of improvement.

The other element that the professor explained was that we never really stop improving. There is always another way to improve. Self-actualization isn’t the end of improvement but the journey of improvement.

Jesse Itzler echoes my former professor in his book Living With the Monks. Itzler says, “Very often the process is more valuable than the outcome. As you struggle in business, with goals, at work – it’s hard to appreciate the journey. However, it is the journey that makes us feel the most alive.”

Putting Itzler’s concept with Maslow’s, being self-actualized means that we appreciate the journey more than the outcome because the journey makes us feel the most alive.

The reason I have never forgotten that college course 20 years ago is because I have experienced this over and over in my life. Once I learned to look at life in this manner, I started to realize that the journey is more important. The process is more important than the goal.

Over and over I found examples in my life that align with that idea. The systems and habits approach to improvement is all about the process. It is about the steps we take, not the destination. Once we learn the importance of the journey, we feel the most alive. We stop waiting to be content. Instead we learn how to become content without becoming complacent.